During National Safety Week, hostage-negotiator-turned-consultant Dan Oblinger delivered one of the most impactful workshops we’ve hosted—full stop. His core message: if we want safer jobsites and stronger teams, we must adopt, adapt, and apply active listening. Humans are storytellers; when people feel safe to share their stories, we ask better questions and get better results. Dan pressed us to build pastoral connections—seeing the human before the job title—because without genuine connection, there’s no real relationship to influence.

He mapped a simple progression we can use on every project: Connection → Active Listening → Empathy → Rapport → Influence → Collaboration. It’s not soft stuff; it’s the center of every hard result. The response? A standing ovation. We’re exploring a follow-up session because this is the skill that powers all the others—negotiation, networking, safety, leadership, and performance.

Top Takeaways

  • Stories first. Stories lower defenses and surface what really matters.
  • Listen like a pro. Suspend your rebuttal; reflect, label, and summarize before you ask for action.
  • Make “pastoral” connections. Care personally; people move when they feel seen.
  • Questions beat assumptions. “What’s the real challenge for you here?” unlocks clarity and trust.
  • Rapport is a safety tool. High-trust crews speak up early—before small hazards become big incidents.
  • Influence follows empathy. Earn the right to be heard by proving you’ve heard them.

Try This This Week

  • Run a 5-minute “story round.” Open your next huddle with: “Tell us one thing that’s making your job easier/harder today.”
  • Use the 3-step listen. Reflect their words, name the feeling, summarize the ask—then respond.
  • One pastoral touch. Ask one teammate a non-work question and remember the answer. Bring it back tomorrow.

Why It Matters

Communication is the multiplier. Most “technical” misses—poor handoffs, weak negotiations, fuzzy scopes, safety lapses—trace back to how (or whether) we listened. Training isn’t a luxury; it’s how we protect people, budgets, and reputations.

 

Kelly’s Note: 

I’m not easy to impress after four decades of programs, but this one? One of the best I’ve experienced. The standing ovation said the quiet part out loud—we need more of this. We’d like to bring Dan back for an advanced, hands-on session (role-plays, field scenarios, and supervisor toolkits). If your team wants in, say the word and we’ll prioritize seats.